What I've Learned (Facing My Giants)

This season (the past 5 years, but particularly this past year) has been a marathon of facing down giants of fear, self-hatred, weakness, insecurity, and change. I kept saying that I didn't choose it, and yet every step of the way, the Lord has rewired me, drawn me deeper into relationship, empowered me, and given me treasures of experiential insight that I'm still applying to the path ahead--a path which I'm finally excited to be on. I would like to share with you some of the hard-won principles He's built into my life during this season.

• Slow down regularly. Practice listening and sitting in God’s presence with no agenda. Let Him flow through you. He’s the source of your power—everything you need is in Him.

• We can tell whether we’re in God’s will by what kind of fruit we’re bearing. If we’re in the will of God, we will be bearing good fruit even in hard times. If you're stagnating or bearing bad fruit, take action! Ask God how to be vulnerable, confront issues, and start bearing fruit.

• God isn’t going to hold you accountable for some best-case scenario you can’t control but for what He has given you to steward. If you refuse to mature in Him until everything around you lines up the way you want, you’re choosing to remain stuck and lose the ability to appreciate it when He does move. The maturity we are meant to walk out in Christ needs to begin now. Don’t wait.

• There is a time to stop complaining about the opportunities that don’t exist where you are. Sometimes that’s an invitation to push further, reach farther, or engage with what is within your reach.

• In our culture today, we often feel victimized if we are being asked to push beyond our limits. We must develop more of a tolerance for the resistance in which we learn to depend on God, grow stronger, and embrace blessings we wouldn’t have gone after if everything had remained easy.

• When contending for promises (things God wants you to take hold of in Him), it’s easy to get stuck repeating the same prayers and steps over and over and growing weary with disappointment. That will affect the way we operate. We need to stay alert and awake, engaging with how God wants us to move in this particular part of the journey. This means choosing His mind and heart, engaging with the truth that God has made you strong enough for this. You belong here in this fight/race. Your belief is important.

• Trusting God to redeem your past and rewire you as you work with Him on continual healing is step one. But the next step (just as scary) is being willing to take what you’re learning and apply it in new places God calls you to. He’ll likely call you out into opportunities that you don’t feel ready for, but it’s essential that we judge ourselves based on His assessment, not ours. Otherwise, we’ll hold back from the very places God wants to show us His glory and move through us.

• When you’re going through a season of delay where God is asking you to wait on something you want in order to mature in Him, the temptation is to look around and wonder why others get to have/do what you want. This is a distraction and a misunderstanding. You don’t know what they’ve been going through, and what they’re doing now isn’t necessarily a reward. The best you can do is pray for them to submit to maturity in God and then do the same yourself. God is preparing you for what you’re going to be carrying, which is different than what others are carrying. Be ready to submit to what is necessary for your growth.

• DON’T QUIT! You have more in you than what you’ve put forth so far. Don’t waste it. Give God all you have. Let Him do the rest.

• There are so many blessings along this path that God wants us to see. The people He’s surrounded us with, the things we’re learning, the daily refreshment He brings us. Open your eyes to the miracles all around you every day, and you’ll be better equipped to embrace the “big” ones.

• God will not waste you.

• Don’t try to manipulate what you become in people's eyes. Just listen and obey, and God will unleash favor and impact over what He’s producing through you. He’ll open the doors He knows you’re ready for and shut other doors to protect you. He’ll make sure you’re invited to the right places and recognized by the right people. Think David and Samuel—in spite of Jesse.

• God may direct you to certain resources, but they aren’t your ultimate hope. If they fail you, God can work things out a different way.

• The effort you’re putting forth isn’t to earn or deserve what God promised. He will carry the impact and timing and power of fulfillment. You’re simply engaging with Him and doing all you can to be ready.

• We need to stay in community, sharing stories back and forth of how God has been faithful—they’re not formulas for us to copy, but they’re faith-boosters reminding us how God moves and how we can engage with Him in everyday situations.

• While we do need the counsel of other seasoned believers, we need to be led by the voice of Jesus because sometimes His will for us will defy human “wisdom”.

• If you aren’t certain about a move or word initially, ASK GOD QUESTIONS! He wants you to learn something from the process and apprehend His heart.

• Clarity can become an idol. Sometimes, God isn’t going to fill in the blanks we want Him to until we take the step He’s told us to take. Sometimes, He’s trusting us to make a choice. If we’re willing to see it, God often has side quests and reprieves in mind for us that we would miss out on if we insisted on Him spoon-feeding us the whole plan.

• In the life of faith, we’re not reciting a script that’s being fed to us. We’re overflowing with His fountain within us.

• Don’t live afraid of mistakes. That’s not a biblical life. God is leading us in more authority and power for His purposes as we embrace each level of freedom in Him.

There's something so refreshing and validating in the knowledge that in spite of my confusion and frustration, my God reached through all that fog and got me here. Now, whatever happens, He will get the glory! As tough as it’s been, I wouldn’t trade this season for anything in the world.

If you're in a season that feels pointless or aimless, pursue God with everything you have. Throw out anything that says this is a waste of time. Nothing is impossible with God. Resolve to love Him forever and give Him all you've got. Take another step into your promised land. And He’ll do immeasurably more than you could ask or think.

And then?

It'll be time to go and fight some new giants.